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Posts Tagged ‘Flexibility’

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I’m going through an intense process right now where I’m learning the way of the heart. It’s something totally new to me. It has felt like a knowing beyond thought or emotion and it has been powerful. We’ve been in this pilgrimage and staying true to that, the truth that I cannot even see. I find myself standing in pitch darkness, as this way of living, feeling and breathing is not something familiar to how I used to be, but with some profound sense of grace that seems to keep guiding me, as I stand firm in the dark, I begin to see even the dark transformed into a kind of light… I am still learning to find the words to be able to express this in a very grounded and practical way, but trust me on this – this way that I am discovering is revealing itself to be far more practical and efficient than anything else I have ever known. I believe the words through which I can express this to others will come more clearly in time.

The simple joys of life… its actually what I am also using as a foundation for every step that I am taking now… a foundation of keeping the simple pleasures as a real treasure and gift… and it seems to propel me somehow to a deeper sense of knowing who I am.

I guess that is the question that has gained in intensity for me over the years, to truly know what and who I am not merely as a soul, but as a presence, in my very essence, beyond this body and my circumstances…. it is not only for me that I ask this question, but out of love for the world and everyone and everything that I cherish.

There is an old saying that I am truly beginning to understand now – you may have heard of it – “Physician, Heal Yourself First!” Only then can I truly help to heal others, by resolving my own blocks and fears. I feel this is a worthy path – a powerful way to walk in life. My deepest love to you and for you.

Brother, ‘go with the flow’ has become such empty meaningless words that stand more to say, “do whatever you feel like’ rather than about following one’s true INTENT – which can create NEW FLOWS – which is the Master of the flow itself. What people in the world most find themselves struggling with now is these empty philosophical cliches they carry around, deceiving themselves that they are somehow ‘faking it to making it’… but there ARE WORDS – perfect words – to express in every single moment, that are an emanation of the Sri Yantra… of the primordial fractal…. there are indeed words for this… and by saying I am learning to find the words, the deeper intent is that I am learning the mystery and mastery of alignment with oneself. The flow is a servant to the divine, not vice versa.

But to do that, first one aligns with the flow… one becomes merged with it… and then one CHANGES IT.

I know when I say your ‘new age cliches’ of ‘follow the flow’ are a block to you, you find yourself then faced with not knowing WHERE to STEP or what CHOICE to make… which is why you keep running back to the cliches… but as a dear divine friend told me a few days ago, there is great joy in PUSHING against one’s own shackles.

I wish to see those around me free, I wish to see myself free – in order to do that I have had to muster the balls to truly, objectively, look at the texture of my own prisons… those handcuffs I have painted gold and yet named them my prized jewels… and though there is a truth in that my own blocks, wounds and fears, as I become free, become the very weapons of freedom that I can then pass onto others… first they still must be seen for the prisons that they are.

I am learning not to get caught in catch-22s and circular arguments – as they are slow and life-sucking, and ultimately – FALSE.

There are no catch-22s. The paradox is that there is no paradox. That is not a circle.

This has become a very simple question for me, simple yet incredibly potent – the intensity of the question – WHO AM I? WHAT AM I? And what stands between ME and ME?

Do you truly ask yourself this? Or do you run from it? It is a question to be asked from the very core, to at the very least be honest about the choices we are making. I refuse to lie to myself any longer – it makes me evolve at breathtaking speed, and I embrace it.

Others can muster the courage to keep pace…. or to die slowly rotting in their own dungeons and fears… but sacrifice is not the way of true joy. I must FLY to my ancient home. None and nothing shall stand in my way now.

Much love.

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One thing I’ve been exploring lately is Myers-Briggs testing. In the past, I’ve found the tests assessment of my personality to be very accurate. I was looking at my profile and my weaknesses and I read through more of the profile types, etc.  I think I have a pretty good feel for the meaning of most of the types as well as a better feel for traits of my own.

What I found in reading through the strengths and weaknesses of each type was that having a personality type that is non-flexible is the root of much weakness (okay, duh). Moreover, I doubt the inherency of any personality trait. But, interestingly, I found a couple of the axis where I could easily go either way with a change that I knew how to make. For instance, in my functions for gathering information, I tend to trust symbols, personal meanings, and instinctual reactions a lot more than my five senses. That’s just been my natural “home base” for whatever reason.

So one simple thing to do is develop my ability to trust my five senses. And yes, in my experience, I’ve found grounding exercises like using Zhuan Zhang in Wujifa, or just being mindful have given me tremendous benefits.

Of course, the strengths of a person normally come from dominant traits. I observed a few years ago that in many cases, anyone that appears to be a genius in an area is highly unbalanced towards a trait or function. So the places where we’re “eccentric,” are often the places where we blow everyone else away. Or, a specific trait that is extraordinary to most people is so ordinary to us that we hardly think about it — the two side effects of this being that a) we can appear extraordinary or “genius” in that regard to others and b) we miss the ability to naturally or easily do what’s ordinary or “normal” for most people to do without thinking about it.

So we don’t want to neutralize our strengths in this process. It’s okay to have a “home base” but if we notice that our own easiest path is, in a particular case, not getting us anywhere, it’s really useful to be able to shift to another way of doing it.

The MBTI is relatively easy to work with. I think I have a really good grasp of it after only spending a few hours here and there of the last few years, as well as recently spending an afternoon and an evening reading through it. But the most useful part was in comparing how each variable shifted the whole, and changed the personality archetype significantly.  I spent a lot of time reading about the personality types that were just one change of one axis away from mine.

Knowing these little bits, and seeing where my chief weaknesses are, I can also narrow down to a few shifts I can make sometimes. Just like in Kung Fu, when someone smacks your head, you go to the highest level of training you have encoded outside of rational thought. In other words, you’re only going to use your favorite couple of moves/strategies in a fight. So it’s good to make them very streamlined and versatile.

Just my own strategies:

INFP — Shifting to ISFP when I’m failing to achieve a goal. By paying more attention to facts, data, details and concrete experience instead of symbolic interpretations, hunches, new ideas and “the big picture.”
— Shifting to INTP when I’m taking things a bit too personally and need some detachment. By thinking about hard truth and logic more than tact, compassion, people, and harmony.

I can almost boil both of those down to just a detached assessment of grounded information.

Of course, the only difficulty here would be my general “comfort” with my current personality. I mean, I genuinely do prefer to do the things that an INFP would do. I feel the personality test pegs me very well and I truly and authentically have the personality tendencies that it consistently tests in me.

One thing that helped me, in that regard, was just reading all the other types and noticing the methods other people use to engage in behaviors and preferences that I would greatly dislike. Funny, those preferences can seem so “obviously true,” even MORALLY true in a gut sense to me… yet there are people who have preferences different than my own, who feel a different set of obvious tastes.

One thing that shows up for me, for instance, and other INFPs is a problem with conflict. The conflicts show up because we genuinely want to achieve harmony with other people, yet genuinely have a deep seated sense of internally created values (separate from almost any social-group values).

I saw HOW people who take in more external stimulus to make decisions can enjoy the moment more while also being good at accomplishing their objectives (due to calibrating activities to serve their intention). And I saw HOW people who just think about things, weighing the data, instead of feeling out everything can avoid taking things personally and thus consistently choose honesty regardless of what other people think or if they feel offended.

Taken on a small level, and analyzed as a shift on those axis, I find the shifts less repulsive. In looking at the little pieces of how the behaviors I have trouble making within myself are actually achieved, I was able to find acceptable ways to get to them… the “how” of what some people are doing more easily than myself. That’s a lot of leverage to be had in overcoming habits and weaknesses!

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